Happy Valentines

February 13, 2009 at 7:17 am | Posted in Firmly Uncategorized | 2 Comments

(Witness the firepower of this fully armed and operational LEGO heart)

It’s Valentine’s Day soon and since I’m too busy on some projects right to come up with something romantic to do, I’ll once again share some of my best chat-up lines for other single men. Feel free to use them and report back here to tell me how you get on. Better still, add yours:

• Getting straight to the point: Hey, feeling broody?
• Do you come here often? If so, where would the bathrooms be? I’m bursting.
• Finding common interests: Do you like biscuits?/ Wow, I like watching TV too!
• You’re lucky I like fat/ ugly chicks…
• You look like Pamela Andersons sister: Old and wear too much make up.
• You look like an Amanda. I’ve been looking for Amanda hug ‘n kiss
• You look like a Tina. There was a Tina in my class once.
• Striking up a conversation: So, I take it you’re a girl then?
• I’m officially drunk enough for you to take advantage of me.
• Compliment her: Your ponytail is very bouncy. I like that.
• Impress that special someone: The spoiler on my car is huuge/ I killed a man
• Yeah, you’ll do I suppose.
• There’s a party in my pants but it’s very loud and the neighbours are complaining
• You’re my Mount Everest. Not because you’re so big, it’s because I want to climb you (This one has never worked, oddly enough)
• Impressing with a different language: Ciúnas bothar, cailín bainne.
• Make up a romantic poem: Roses are red, violets are yellow. I’m colourblind and you’ve got great boobs.

Happy Valentines Day/ Singles Awareness Day bitches!